Incapable

Yesterday, I flew to Oregon to do some worship music at a Christmas Dinner for an organization  called Camp Agape. It is a camp devoted to helping and showing Jesus to kids with incarcerated parents. Needless to say it was a pretty amazing experience for a girl who has had her parents at her side for her entire life. I love going and serving with my brother because I never come home the same person as when I left. I always learn something.

This time I learned that sometimes it's the things we find ourselves incapable of that God expects of us. But at the same time, He's not asking too much. How could He? He gave it all and He didn't even have to. Yet when something is too hard for us, we get mad and dare to accuse Him of putting a mountain in front of us. We act like He has no right to put mountains wherever He pleases. Why is that? In fact, that is the most beautiful way to build a mountain. So that we can't climb it. If we could climb a mountain on our own, it wouldn't be much of a mountain now would it? So here I find myself, standing at the bottom of a mountain, looking up at the top and wondering why in the world I'm supposed to climb it when I don't even have any ropes. But the question in itself is the very answer. I'm supposed to climb it because I know I can't. God is the only one that's going to get me up that mountain. If I get that, when I look out at the view from the top, I will know for sure, that it's all because of Jesus. And I will see the view for what it really is. Once I fully come to the understanding that everything I could ever do is for and because of Him, that's when I can show Jesus to the people that I so desperately want to love and serve. It starts with being incapable.

Everybody has a mountain really. Everyone feels like they can't handle the load at times. That's just the perfect time for God to work miracles. He works by setting us aside and loving others with a self-sacrificing love, an "Agape" love through us. We just can't do it on our own. We are incapable.